June 16th
I was antsy. On edge. Cooped up. Tired of watching movies and the not-so-good, mediocre (yes I realize it's redundant and yes it is on purpose--and necessary) television reality shows.
Ready to get out. Go back to the wilderness. The untamed environment and land of wildflowers.
So I said to Andrew, my younger, taller, studly, brotha--I says to him, "Andrew! To the bat mobile! We're going."
He jumped into his green tights and cape and was ready in lightning speed.
Through the sleepy town of Florence and the barren land of Penrose, we drove.
And then....I turned left.
There's a lot that can happen when you take a left turn. A lot of possibilities and life changing events waiting to take place. This is true despite me being unable to walk under ladders, touch a penny on the ground that is facing tails side up, or always throwing salt over my shoulder whenever I knock over a salt shaker at the restaurant I work at.
No. This is real life. Not just superstitious.
And as we drove our eyes beheld such wonders.
Two camels. No-three camels, one of them was hiding behind the other two. Chewing on cud? Just chilling.
Peacocks in the back. Ostriches. Llamas. All in one beautiful, happy place on the outskirts of the po-dunk town of Penrose, Colorado.
Of course, that led to the conversation of what to call an animal mix of an ostrich, llama, peacock, and camel. I think the best we got was llamockichamel. Or maybe it was peallamostamel. . . .
Gawking and giggling, cursing ourselves for not bringing a camera, we drove on.
Huge, breathing, grunting, buffaloes were around the next corner. Looking at us, bored and sleepy. Encircled by a fence with a post that read: "No roller skating in or around the buffalo herd."
For those of you who do not get the joke of this clever "farmer" refer to here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z7a1-bCrmRQ
So true, Roger Miller, so true.
Our journey was far from over.
Another left turn. The goal was to find a place I had been taken to by a high school boyfriend as a senior in high school, a few years ago. It was a sneaky little, creepy, old building hiding in the woods in the mountains across a creek full of leeches (as I had learned one summer day, sticking my flip flop cladded foot into the water. . ). Then, I had sworn to never show anyone else this very secret place. But then, I thought I was in love. Joke's on him, right? ;)
By this time we had about an hour of sunlight left. Driving along a dirt rode which my poor little car could barely handle, I pointed that fact out.
"Andrew," I said, "We have about an hour or so before this turns into a really bad idea. . . . especially if my car breaks down. . . and I just realized we didn't tell anyone where we were going. In fact, I'm not entirely sure of where we are. Do you have service? No? I thought not. . . oh and we're going to explore a creepy house in the woods--cool right?"
I wish I could capture in the written word the noises of incredulity that came from my brother's mouth. I suppose the best I can do is this: puhwah-fshh-tah?????
While trying to pronounce that, shake your head really fast and scrunch up your nose and widen your eyes. Careful don't hurt yourself. Alright, there ya go. I think you got it! Good job. I almost thought you were my brother for a moment. Almost. . . .
Yes, it was true. Andrew was right. We were at the beginnings of a perfect horror story. We even passed a random cabin next to the road, secluded with curtains that seemed to move behind the glass. Surely, a killer, waiting for two dumb kids to wander into this part of the mountains. Surely.
And don't forget the old school house further down the road that had a fire in the 1920s and was obviously haunted by little kids and a teacher. Obviously.
I had worked Andrew up so much, he was tense. Incredibly tense. He kept looking around at the dimly lit terrain saying things like "are you sure we should do this?" "If something comes after us, I'm out of here--I will run and LEAVE YOU BEHIND"
So....naturally. . . . while driving, and as he was turned around in his seat, searching for some kind of weapon to wield in the back seat, I turned, looked out his window and screamed with sheer terror.
For that moment alone, I should have an emmy award sitting on my shelf right now.
Even now, I'm laughing just remembering his face, his whole body even. Frozen, with fear. His eyes wide, his mouth parted, his face white. Oh my word! It was so beautiful. Tears streaming down my face, I had to pull over and just get all the laughter out. I couldn't breath. In fact, it hurt to gasp for air. It was so perfect. So easy.
It didn't take long for Andrew to come around and laugh with me. I got him good. I wish I could somehow take that picture in my mind that is causing me to chuckle even now and put it here for you to see. hahahahahahahaha.
*sigh*
"I don't even know why I was so scared?? Why was that so dang scary?!?!"
I don't know Andrew. I don't know. You big scaredy pants.
Thirty minutes later, we made it to the parking lot.
To the right of the parking lot, there's a nice little trail.
To the left?
A beautiful meadow leading out into the woods and deeper into the mountains. Untamed wilderness.
We took a left. Andrew arming himself first with my ice scraper from my car and my extra coat that I always keep in the back, just in case. Yah, we were pretty much as safe as possible. Dangerous looking too. What with Andrew lost in my big puffy coat, holding a plastic, blue scraper. And me, with my "huge" stature and mean looking glare. Very dangerous.
Standing in the meadow, the green vegetation, the quiet, the dark mountains and the tall grasses (they came up to my waist in some areas), Andrew said the obvious, "wow this is awesome."
So we stood back to back, and did a slow 360 degree turn to take it all in. Of course it was necessary to stand back to back. The moment clearly called for it.
And then we were off. Trekking. I felt a few creatures scurry past on my Chaco-cladded feet and somehow fought the urge to cry out. The terrain, however, was different. There were now two streams and the trees and undergrowth were even more wild than when I had been there last, years ago. I thought it wise to keep to some kind of marker. So, following animal trails and walking on fallen trees we zig zagged our way into the growth, me trying to remember which way to go. One especially large tree assisted in our first crossing over the first stream. We walked along its fallen, thick, trunk and realized that it was part of a tree that had been split right down the middle. Amazing. I looked down into the hole of the roots, studied the clean cut of both sides of this magnificent tree lying on the ground mirroring each other. Lightning. Awesome.
We followed that tree for a while, jumping off, to find the second stream. The original stream--the one I remembered stepping in only to discover leeches enjoying a good meal on my flip-flop cladded foot. It was so different. Much larger. Faster. Deeper. Farther away from the creepy building. I felt silly for expecting everything to look exactly as I had last seen it. Landscapes change. The sunlight was fading fast. And alas, Andrew and I were unable to cross the stream to explore before night circled in. The house was barely visible and we were only able to see it because we knew what to look for. Dark and eery, shrouded even more from view it peek above the tall, tall weeds. We promised we would return and fully explore that creepy building properly and started our journey back to the car.
And there we saw them. In the meadow. Two black figures. Large, in the distance. Eyes. Upon us. My brain didn't even register what they were. Andrew though, used his super power called "deductive reasoning" and claimed, "horses!"
Two beautiful, black, possibly wild, horses.......trotting......racing....right towards us.
"Oh shoot! Run!"
And run we did. Laughing, of course. Or maybe just smiling. I'm almost certain there was laughter.
As I turned to look back to see if we were still being chased, I saw those two darn horses, stopped, heads cocked to one side looking as if they were thinking we were a bunch of crazies. I made sure a fence separated Andrew and myself from them before we stopped, however. They came trotting over to say hello. We petted their noses, fed them weeds, dodged their biting mouths and wandering tongues (seriously, not even kidding, those tongues were crazy and would have made some hilarious pictures! When they weren't nipping at us, they were definitely trying to lick us). Named them Midnight and Shadow. Tried to figure out if they were wild or not. Cursed ourselves for not bringing a camera and smiled a whole lot. After crooning in Midnight's ear softly, I managed to give his neck a nice little massage for a bit without even getting bitten. Horse whisperer, they call me. ;)
And again, Andrew said the obvious, "this is so awesome," as Shadow nudged him, trying to get a taste of the stylish blue coat he was wearing.
Driving home, slowly in the dark having been missing for a couple of hours from civilization, we said with satisfaction of how perfect this little adventure had been. And indeed it was. It was pretty great.
And then, we saw a bear.
The end.
*grateful for being able to hang out with Andy-drew*
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